Back At It, With A Refund

Well, after almost two months off, we're back at it. Well, not "it" .. yet ;) But I've begun another cycle of treatment.

And as trying and expensive as this can be, I did get some good (although weird) news.

When I called the pharmacy we use (it specializes in fertility meds), to refill my two prescriptions for this cycle (ovidrel and femara), the lady took my order and gave me a total. Problem was, the total was over a hundred dollars less than it was in January. After she gave me the total, I literally said, "And that's for which one of the medicines?" She responded, "Both."

I was skeptical, and waited for my debit card to billed the correct amount.

A few days later, the meds arrived.. and to my surprise, I was only billed the quoted amount. So, then I became curious, because I KNEW I had paid so much more last time. Within a few minutes, I found my old receipt. And for the letrozole (generic femara), the cost went from $180 in January, to $40 in April?!

I called the pharmacy, hoping that I'd luck out and the first time I was overcharged. It took several phone calls to get a hold of someone with an answer. As it turns out, I was sort of a guinea pig back in January. What I didn't know, was that the letrozole had just been released and was brand new on the market. With the passing of just a couple months, even more drug companies started making it, so the price plummeted.

So, as odd a feeling as it was to know that I was one of the first to try it, it was a relief knowing that going forward, our meds would cost almost $150 less each month. That should give us a little breathing room, anyway. (Not that the whole process is suddenly cheap, but I'll take what I can get.)

Much to my surprise, a few days later, I had a voicemail from the pharmacy; stating that they saw that I had called about a price difference between my two orders, and that as a one time courtesy, they'd refund the difference...

I swore I misunderstood the voicemail. No way are they going to refund $140, when they don't really owe it to me, and I didn't even ask for it. Right?

Wrong. A few days later, it was credited to my account.

Color me impressed. :)

So, if you find yourself in a situation like mine, ask your doctor to send your scripts to Freedom Fertility Pharmacy. Customer service doesn't get much better than that!

I just started my letrozole today, and will have my ovarian ultrasound in a couple weeks, to see if it worked. *fingers crossed*

Trigger Shot and Symptom Spotting

So, at the end of the last post, I stated that I had to take a trigger shot that evening. It's an injection of Ovidrel, that's supposed to force ovulation. This, by far, was the worst part of everything I've been through so far.

I stood in the mirror at my bathroom sink, repeatedly watching the how-to video on my Nook tablet. Did I get all the air out? Do I put it in at an angle or perpendicular? Is this two inches from belly button? Am I supposed to put it in the same side as my dominant follicle, or does it matter? And, oh yeah, there's a needle!

I kept telling myself to do it quickly, like ripping off a bandaid.. but I just could.not.do.it. My fingers went numb. I kid you not, it took at least a full 90 seconds from when the needle started going into my skin, before it was actually all the way in. Then at least another two minutes to actually push in the plunger.

By the time I was done, I was leaning against the sink, feeling like I was going to vomit. As soon as I took out the needle, I collapsed onto the bed.. drenched in a cold sweat. Like I told you, the worst experience to date.

As instructed, we "got busy" for the next three evenings, and I was instructed to take a pregnancy test on the morning of March 3rd.

In the meantime, I had all sorts of symptoms. Cravings, food aversions, extreme bloating, tender breasts, nausea, etc. Problem is, like anyone TTC will tell you, is that the meds that make you ovulate, actually give you pregnancy symptoms. So, you can never trust any of them.

One thing I hated about this cycle though, was not knowing if I even ovulated. You take the injection to 'cause' it.. but you never really know if it worked.

Anyway, like most women, I was guilty of taking a couple tests early.. both negative.

So I waited for March 3rd. By then, all the symptoms had pretty much stopped, so I was pretty sure of the results I would see. BFN (Big Fat Negative).

And just to add insult to injury, within 3 hours of taking the pregnancy test, my period started. Thank you, mother nature, for flippin' me the finger. Appreciate it.

Obviously, I'm disappointed. I took a few minutes to cry.. and then moved on. Because I know statistically, that even if everything works perfectly, it'll probably take a few attempts. Like I said though, we don't even know if I actually ovulated.

But, due to financial costs (for Femara and injection, it's around $700/month; that we just don't logistically have laying around), I'm planning on taking this month off. And since my cycle started already, I wouldn't be able to get the meds in time anyway. So, we probably won't try again until April. Though, I am NOT looking forward to doing that injection again.

It's just hard, knowing that time is ticking away. Some people will say age doesn't matter much anymore. Sure, it's easier for older women to get pregnant with all the technologies. But the expense is also higher as you climb the technology ladder, and the risks to the baby are far higher the older you get. It's definitely something that weighs on me.

Glimmer of Hope

So, I had another ovarian ultrasound this morning (cycle day 12). I went into this one a little bit more hopeful, as I felt like I could tell the drugs were working.

I was on Femara this cycle, and last night, I was getting very sharp pains from the area around my right ovary. It also felt swollen when I would massage that area.

And sure enough, the ultrasound showed a 20mm follicle in my right ovary. A good sign, for sure. They look for follicles that are 18-20mm, and I've never even gotten close before. My left ovary, on the other hand, had a few tiny ones; but none that were viable to mature. But, they tell me it's normal for one ovary to dominate each cycle.

So, I drove home with a little sense of hope; immediately texting my husband to share the news, and then stopped at Starbucks for my own personal celebration of a smoothie and blueberry scone (but let's not dwell on that). I know it's still a long shot. But at least I know we can check one thing off the list of hurdles we need to overcome. Who knew that cancer medications and fertility yoga could actually get my ovaries to do something they're supposed to do?

I've been instructed to take my trigger shot tonight. This is super scary to me. I don't particularly like injections (who does?), and I really don't like the idea of giving myself one in the stomach. *shivers*

We won't really know if this cycle worked until early to mid March. So stay tuned.

Medications & Money

So, today, since I was off work.. I had time to call the 'recommended' mail-order pharmacy to get my meds for this cycle. According to the doctor, since they are a "specialized" pharmacy, they tend to be cheaper. They're called Freedom Fertility Pharmacy.

I only needed two medications. One is the Clomid. The other is the shot I have to take if the Clomid works, called Ovidrel. No surprise, insurance won't pay for either. They gave me the generic Clomid, but apparently Ovidrel has no generic counterpart. My out-of-pocket, for those two medications (that I'll take for a total of 6 days) is...

$120.35

Bleh.

Yeah, I know it's hardly earth-shattering.. and pales in comparison to the 15k needed for IVF. But still, it's a good chunk of a paycheck; especially around the holidays. Not to mention, we'll have to pay for an ultrasound for each attempt. Fingers crossed that this works.. because my brain and my wallet may not be up for anything more drastic.